Yesterday Harmony, NC....next month Ellerbee, NC

Yesterday was District 7 competition for the East Forsyth Hunter Safety Shooting Team! And the team that C was on placed 1st....did ya HEAR me....1ST in Archery!!!! C scored a 198 out of 200. And in shotgun he scored 180 out of 200. The team that he was on was invited to the STATE competition in Ellerbee, NC in April. They beat Forbush by 1 point!!!

Now the practice starts ALL over again on Tuesday. He has to requalify for shotgun, archery, and rifle. He didn't get to shoot rifle in this competition even though he came in 7th out of 28. And the reason is that would have put him on the 2nd team, and once you qualify on a high team you are on that team. One of the guys on his team won individual award for archery, he beat C by 1 point. Now we have raffles and dinners to run to hopefully raise money so that if they do really well at State they can go to Nationals in New Mexico in July.

It was 83 degrees there yesterday and talk about HOT!!!! I guess I'll have to design and get more t-shirts made for the group. It's a good thing that I had t-shirts made for them, they all ended up stripping down to their t-shirts. This is the one that I've been working on for them to wear to Nationals if they make it. And to put logos of sponsors on there.

Claps hands AND grins REAL big

Today C qualified for Shotgun and Rifle (it was the last day for this event), and he scored 18 of 20 and 19 of 20.

And THEN when the team had finished qualifying on one of the shotgun stations, K brought out her shotgun and her father sat at the thrower and pulled the trap for her. That child shot 5 or 6 out of 10. And she looked great. I just wish I had taken my camera and had taken her picture.

This coming Saturday is District competition, and I'm taking the DVD camcorder so that I can record all the action.

Be Tender With My Love....

I had iTunes on today and this song started to play so you know me...LOL...I HAD to copy the lyrics to it.....

Fanny (Be Tender With My Love)

First I rise, then I fall
Seems like you don't want the love
Of this man at all
And it's sure been a lonely time
Right up to the time I met you
So if you take a love like mine

Be tender with my love;
You know how easy it is to hurt me
Fanny, be tender with my love,
'Cause it's all that I've got
And my love won't desert me

So you say to yourself, boy,
You're out of your brain;
Do you think I'm gonna stand here
All night in the rain?
And it's the start of a love affair
The moment when I first met you
And if you want I'll take you there;

Be tender with my love;
You know how easy it is to break me
Fanny, be tender with my love,
'Cause it's all that I've got
And my love won't forsake me.

With my love,
Our love will seal it together.
Oh, with our love,
You made a promise
You'll always love me forever.

Be tender with my love;
You know how easy it is to break me
Fanny, be tender with my love,
'Cause it's all that I've got
And my love won't forsake me

If it's too good to be true....

does that go for people too? Today has been a day for thinking. I received a lovely gift today from a special friend, and it made me think. Then CD is here now and it made me stop and think too, about things in my life. I then started to think about the saying of "If it's too good to be true...it probably is"...and I wondered if people were in that too. CD seems to be a wonderful man...okay not seems to be...he is...or he's learning and he wants to be and he trying REAL hard to be. He's outside at the moment sanding a dresser so that he or I can paint it and make it appear the way I want it to be. He would do ANYTHING for me...but that scares me.

I've been on my own now for almost 6 years and I'm sorta kinda stuck in my ways. I asked him today if he noticed that I can be hardheaded where some things are concerned. He laughed and said...SOME???? Okay...okay.....more then some...but you have to understand in the past whatever I said or thought was of NO concern...it didn't matter. And now that I've been on my own for the last few years...I've been able to do what I want to do...withOUT worrying what someone else would say.

My fear is that I'll be too hardheaded and I won't take his thoughts and feelings into play. I believe the longer we're on our own, the more we think, it's MY way or the highway. I want to break this mold...but I'm also in the mind set that I REFUSE to be hurt again, so I try to act like NOTHING hurts me....WRONG. Today after CD and I talked...I told him about something that happened to me when I arrived at work one day....that I haven't told him before...and he grabbed me and hugged me...and I looked at him like WTF???? I'm okay...nothing happened, and he said....but something could have...and I said....well yeah, but it didn't.

And then we started to talk about my Mama....and I started to cry. I am such a wimp! I let the thought run thru my head about grieving someone that you've lost and I wondered how long does it take to get over it....and then as I was crying, I wondered if I would EVER get over it. How long DO you have to be strong? I'm afraid that if I keep trying to be strong, that I will be looked at as being cold hearted and unfeeling. And I don't know which is worse...cold-heartness or unfeeling.

On that happy note...CAROLINA TARHEELS won their game today....LOL! So see I DO have SOME joy in my life....LMAO! All joking aside...I do have wonderful times in my life. My kids are healthy...I'm healthy...and CD is back from Kuwait. I have wonderful friends who I KNOW I can count on in a crisis. So I guess I should SD&STFU!

HE DID IT!!!!

I took C this morning to get his license, and he passed the driving test!!!!! And of all the reactions I could have had...I sat there and cried when he walked back into the office and had a BIG grin on his face. Tears just started to roll down my face. My little boy is just another step on his journey to becoming my BIG boy....since he'll ALWAYS be my baby boy!!

And here's what he will be driving.

The games that people play.....

or better yet...ex husbands. He should be the master of head games. Last night C came home and handed me back the check that I wrote to play 1/2 of his auto insurance for the year. With the comment...Daddy wants you to call him...(all I could think was...why, is his dialing finger broke?). Anyway I called him...mistake #1. J said to me, I gave C that check to give back to you. I don't know how much his insurance will be. BULL!!! Then he started....I have a question for you...did you buy C a truck? And I thought, like I have to tell you???!

He then goes into the "talk" of C has a truck, and this about the insurance and that about the insurance. I said, wait a minute J...if he's on YOUR policy he's covered to drive MY vehicles...ALL of my vehicles. He replies...yes. So I say then what does it matter if I've bought him a truck...if he's covered...he's covered! He says to me, well I have to tell the insurance company what the primary vehicle will be that he will be driving. I said...what does it matter...if he's covered...he's covered.

Then he drops the major bomb on me...and I was seeing RED. If I could have gotten thru that phone last night I would have....well...I just would have. He said something about the truck that he had brought C. And I said....excuse me, but YOU told me that it wasn't C's truck...that YOU considered it YOUR 3rd vehicle. He replied back with...I NEVER SAID THAT!!!!....okay pick me up off the floor!! I said YES YOU DID! When I said something to you about C thinking that truck was his, you replied with NO That's OUR (he and his wife) 3rd vehicle. And I said to you....well C thinks of it as his, and you said to me...AGAIN...it's OUR 3rd vehicle. If I need it or Grandma needs it, then we WILL have it. He said back to me....AGAIN...I NEVER SAID THAT!!! OMGosh, I was livid...I was shaking...and on the verge of tears! All that J could keep saying was...did you buy him a truck? I wouldn't answer him...it's NONE of his business. He then went on with, well if you did, and I get the insurance it's going to MESS IT ALL UP! Seems to me...like I've said over and over....if he's covered....he's covered.

Then J said something to me about...DO NOT TELL HIM ANYTHING ABOUT THIS CONVERSATION. I replied with, I didn't tell him about the other one, because I KNEW it would crush him, to which I got back....there's nothing to crush him about. I said, yes there was...you said the truck wasn't his, so yes that would have crushed him.

Anyway, J is suppose to be getting the form that C needs to get his license today. And J said that he would take off a week from today on the 12th for C to get his license. The MAIN reason I won't tell J about the truck...which I did buy...was because he likes to TRY to control me as he did when we were married and the way he likes to control the kids. I wouldn't tell him because I KNEW if he knew then he would hold off getting the insurance and the form. After C gets his license the truck will come out of hiding....but not until that time. J also only wants to get insurance for him for ONLY 6 months instead of a year....which I know means, he'll start some crap about....well if you don't do this or you don't do that...then I'm NOT going to renew your policy. If J does NOT attempt to get the form or take C on Monday the 12th, then I'm putting C on my policy and I'm taking him....I'm SICK and TIRED of waiting on him. He's drug his feet long enough.

Also last night C was so down, that I had him sit in my room with me and talk to me. He started to tear up, and he said....Mama I'm tired. I said of what? He replied with, I'm so tired of hearing you say stuff about Daddy and Daddy saying stuff about you...I'm tired of well he said...or well she said. My heart dropped. I looked at him and said, honey I have tried NOT to say ANYTHING about your Daddy around you or your sister. I'm sorry. Then I promised NOT to talk about his father around him again.